August , 2007     Volume 7 - Issue 10

 Mary wrote to say that her brother, Larry O'Shaughnessy has passed away. Larry was living in Arizona but his body was returned to New York for burial. More details will follow when we get an obituary from Mary.

 
Larry's graduation picture...class of '61

 
From our senior trip...Larry in the foreground...Skip Murphy
in the background...Skip died several months ago

News from Denver:

Betty Anne Trapani (Sherin), my life partner, passed away on June 17.

As a remembrance, I am attaching her eulogy prepared and delivered to a standing room only mass by our daughter Christine.

Please feel free to use any or all of it as you may wish in communicating Betty Anne's passing to classmates.

Many thanks
Ron Trapani     303 882 3700

"There will never be words to convey the loss we feel, nor the love we have been blessed to have. Our mother has been so much more than a Mother, she was our best friend and greatest role model...we will miss her deeply. There is no doubt she will continue to be our guiding light when ever we need her. The lessons she taught us are many, and each one has been by example.

She taught us about true love. We were blessed to watch our parents laugh and cry. Argue and make up. Kiss and dance. We will miss the dancing. Their marriage was a fairy tale. One filled with lots of cities and many castles. Through every challenge they faced, their marriage grew stronger. They were sweethearts, they were best friends. Thank for the example of a perfect love.

Mom always said, "God will never give us more than we can handle". Those words will become even more important for us to remember over the coming months and years.

She taught us gratitude, and how to find the true perfection...in the imperfection of each day. She lived her life never taking anything for granted. She said what she felt, when she felt it. But her words always came from her heart, with truth and compassion. She was sincerely grateful for the gift of time that her illness provided her with. She lived her life without regret. We talked about everything. She told us many times that her greatest fear in having a large family was that she wouldn't be there for one of us when we needed her......She always was.

For a long time now there has been a running joke in our family about the "8^th" child. We have had many, many dear friends refer to themselves as the 8^th child. She was always proud of the friends we chose. She knew the ones that would last, and she knew the ones that were there for us to learn a lesson from. She taught us to value both. My Mother didn't just welcome you into her home; she welcomed you into our family. She made you feel as if you were at home and an important part of our family.

Throughout our lives I have often heard people say that the number 7 has mystical and religious meaning. For us, it is simply what we know. Seven daughters....and now, seven grandchildren. I looked up the number seven on the internet this week and learned that the translation is "completeness". Mystical and religious indeed! There are seven of us my dear sisters. Together we are strong, together we are complete.

She taught us patience.

She taught us forgiveness. "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us..." She made the most difficult circumstances........simple. Forgive... and move on. And she always did. She didn't know the meaning of carrying a grudge. It would have been a waste of precious time to her. She was able to love someone for all of their good qualities, and simply not get caught up with the rest.

Her sense of humor was the best. ........ Not that she could ever get though a joke without laughing ...or completely forgetting the punch line. She had the best laugh. We will miss her laugh.

At her first doctors appointment, when all of us were crammed in the room she looked at us and laughed and said "this is ridiculous, you girls don't need to be here for this. For heavens sakes you should be home with the children." Then someone walked past the room and she turned to us and said with that hilarious low, NY accent, did you get a load of that outfit???" She could bring us from panic mode to sheer laughter in a split second. She took care of us when we didn't notice. She healed our pain without us realizing....... She was our strength, in any storm.

The simplicity with which she lived her life...is exactly what made it so amazing. She didn't get caught up with anything. Not anything. Nothing important to my Mother could ever be bought... She was never afraid to die. Many times you hear people describe Cancer as a battle. My Mother referred to her cancer as a nuisance, on Friday she called it this "pesky thing". It seems I have been longing for a word to describe the way my Mother approached it. It was never a battle for her. That would have implied that it was a terrible time. She was truly grateful for the time it gave her. Life was too precious to squander it "fighting a battle".

I came up with the word "Journey". She embraced each obstacle knowing there was something to be learned from it. Her journey was filled with love, faith, honesty and laughter. When her loving doctors told her 2 weeks ago that it was time to stop treatment and begin pain management, she told my Dad later that she didn't want him to think she was a quitter....can you imagine!

She cherished and nurtured every relationship in her life. She told me last week that she had been best friends with Ginny for 60 years. Unbelievable. She loved and valued each of her friendships. And her girl friends knew it. She earned the love and respect of everyone that met her. Her grace and elegance seemed to linger in the room long after she had left. It still does.

I remember Mom telling me a story about when we were young. She told my Dad if he wanted to have a relationship with his daughters it was his responsibility to build it. He certainly did. Thank you Dad. That was a gift too. We are forever grateful Mom, that you chose the perfect man to be the father of seven daughters. Thank you so much. My Fathers friend wrote to us on the website this week and described our Mother as "the face of our family". She truly was. She always will be.

The reason it was so important for me to speak here today was because my Mother shared with me that she had one regret in her life. She didn't speak at her Mother's funeral. On Sunday the girls and I found the eulogy she had written and never read. I wasn't going to do this but Trish told me last night that I should. I hope you don't mind but I would like to share it with you now......

Without a doubt the most important thing our Mother taught us was her faith. Not by reading us the bible or quoting scripture. She simply lived her faith. She loved as Jesus did. She made you want to be a better person. She went to church every Sunday, NOT because she should... ... because she wanted to. It made her sad to know that the church had hurt people enough to leave it. She taught us to love God. Not a particular church or priest. She taught us that a priest is simply a human being. We all make mistakes.....some horrible.........Then find another church, find another priest. Don't place your faith in a humans hands, place it in Gods hands! He will never betray us. Going to church and listening to the words that Jesus gave us, gave her strength. It gives us strength too.

Mom has gone home now to rest, and be with her sons, James and John, her Mother and Father and many other loved ones who I am sure have welcomed her with warm and open arms. Recently she said to us "there is going to be some party when I get to Heaven!" We have no doubt Mom. God will join her now in watching, guiding and protecting the lives she gave us. We love you Mom, and we are honored to strive each day to continue your legacy of gratitude, love and faith."