This appeared in the newsletter back in
January 2002
SIGNS
THAT YOU HAVE GROWN UP:
Credit David Teitel for this, HHS class of 1968
1. Your potted plants are alive. And you can't smoke a-one of them.
2. Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
6. You carry an umbrella. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hookup and breakup.
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 7.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as 'dressed up'.
10. You're the one calling the police because those darn kids next door don't
know how to turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up..
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 p.m.
17. Dinner and a movie - The whole date instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 a.m. would severely upset, rather than
settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drugstore for Ibuprofen and antacids,not condoms and pregnancy
test kits.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer 'pretty good stuff.'
21. You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces "I'm never
going to drink that much again."
23. Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You don't drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
25. You read this entire list looking for one sign that doesn't apply to you.
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Some of
you are too young to remember all of this, but I really think it was a time to
live in.
Joyce
Thornburn Jurgensen, 1967
REMEMBER WHEN:
Mom was at home when the kids got home from school; when nobody owned a purebred
dog; when a quarter was a decent allowance, and another quarter a huge bonus;
when you'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny; when all of your male teachers
wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done and wore high heels; when
you got your windshield cleaned, oil checked and gas pumped without asking, all
for free, every time, and you didn't pay for air, and you got trading stamps to
boot. When it was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a
real restaurant with your parents; when the worst thing you could do at school
was smoke in the bathrooms, flunk a test or chew gum; when a '57 Chevy was
everyone's dream car, to cruise, peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races;
and people went steady and girls wore a class ring with an inch of wrapped yarn
so it would fit her finger. And no one ever asked where the car keys were
because they were always in the car, in the ignition, and the doors were never
locked.
And you got in big trouble if you accidentally locked the doors at home, since
no one ever had a key. Remember lying on your back on the grass with your
friends and saying things like "That cloud looks like a ..." Remember
jumping waves at the ocean (Gulf) for hours in that cold water; and playing
baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game because baseball
was not a psychological group learning experience, it was a game.
Remember when stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals
because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger. And with all our
progress, don't you wish, just once, you could slip back in time and savor the
slower pace and share it with the children of today.
Remember when being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the
fate that awaited a misbehaving student at home. Basically, we were in fear for
our lives, but it wasn't because of drive by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our
parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat!
But we all survived because their love was greater than the threat. Go back with
me for a minute... Before the Internet or the MAC... before semi automatics and
crack ... before SEGA or Super Nintendo... Way back ... I'm talking about hide
and go seek at dusk, red light, green light; kick the can; playing kickball
& dodgeball until your porch light came on... and mother may I? red
rover, hula hoops, roller skating to music, running through the sprinkler...
And... Catching lightning bugs in a jar; Christmas morning; your first day of
school; bedtime prayers and goodnight kisses; climbing trees; getting an ice
cream off the ice cream truck; a million mosquito bites and sticky fingers;
jumping on the bed; pillow fights; running till you were out of breath' laughing
so hard your stomach hurt; being tired from playing; your first crush...remember
that?
I'm not finished yet.... Kool-aid was the drink of summer; toting your friends
on your handle bars; wearing your new shoes on the first day of school and class
field trips. Didn't that feel good, just to go back and say, Yeah, I remember
that! There's nothing like the good old days.
They were good then, and they're good now when we think about them. I want to go
back to the time when............ Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-mo"
and mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "do it over!"
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest; money issues
were handled by whoever was the banker in "Monopoly;" catching
fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening; and it wasn't odd to have two
or three "best" friends. Being old referred to anyone over 20 and the
worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was cooties.
Scrapes and bruises were kissed and made better; it was a big deal to finally be
tall enough to ride the "big people" rides at the amusement park;
getting a foot of snow was a dream come true; abilities were discovered because
of a "double-dog-dare;" Spinning around, getting dizzy and falling
down was cause for giggles; the worst embarrassment was being picked last for a
team; water balloons were the ultimate weapon; and older siblings were the worst
tormentors, but also the fiercest protectors.
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